Humor jokes
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This morning I felt that today was going to be my lucky day. I got up at seven, had seven dollars in my pocket, there were seven of us at lunch and there were seven horses in the seven o'clock race - so I backed the seventh.
Did it win?
No, it came seventh.
What's the difference between a sigh, a car and a monkey? A sigh is oh, dear. A car is too dear. A monkey is you, dear.
Why was six scared of seven? Because seven ate nine.
Q: What's black, white and read all over? A: A newspaper.
What runs all day but never gets tired? Water.
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