Humor jokes

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A young Jewish man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love
and going to get married. He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going
to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm
going to marry."
The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women
into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for
a while.
He then says,"Okay, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry."
She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle."
"That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"
"I don't like her."

Rating: 3.6 |

The young wife was in tears when she opened the door for her
husband. "I've been insulted," she sobbed. "Your mother insulted me."
"My mother!" he exclaimed. "But she is a hundred miles away."
"I know, but a letter came for you this morning and I opened it."
He looked stern, "I see, but where does the insult come in?"
"In the postscript," she answered. "It said: 'Dear Alice, don't
forget to give this letter to George.'"

Rating: 2.4 |

What is the difference between a English actuary and a Sicilian actuary?

An English actuary can tell you how many people are going to die next
year. A Sicilian actuary can give you their names...

Rating: 1.6 |

Did you hear about the fire in the rednecks library? Both the books got burned, and one hadn't even been coloured in yet.

Rating: 2.0 |

How do you cook vegatables in the microwave ? Take them out their wheelchair.

Rating: 3.0 |

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